I don’t think that I need to tell you all how weird things are in the world right now. I’m guessing, unless you live out in the middle of nowhere with no media access, you are well aware (though, if that was the case, you wouldn’t be reading this either. Lol).

Three weeks ago I was on the east coast. My friend and I had traveled to South Carolina for a race on the beach. It was beautiful. The weather was amazing. The ocean was so blue, and the sun was shining. We stayed in an Airbnb in Hilton Head, SC for two nights and we talked about the virus a little bit, as it had really just hit the Seattle area and a little bit in Northern Oregon. We were a *little* bit concerned about what we may find when we came home, but not enough to ruin our vacation.

From Hilton Head, we drove up to Charleston, SC where we parted ways. She headed back home via the Portland airport, and I continued on my travels through Charleston, Charlotte, Knoxville, and finally down to Atlanta for the ClickAway photography conference. I was super excited to learn all kinds of fun, new tips and tricks for my boudoir, wedding, and birth photography!

Over the course of those four days things started to get just a tad worse. There was a little bit of concern about attending the conference (or that would it get cancelled completely), but we were told not to worry. That the show would go on, and that there would be plenty of handwashing/sanitizing stations available throughout the conference hall. And there definitely were! We made the decision not to hug or shake hands in greeting or thanks. Everyone was prefacing a cough, sneeze, or runny nose with, “I swear, I’m not sick, my allergies are just acting up!” At that point in time, I was still thinking that everything was blown out of proportion and didn’t understand why we were all getting so bent out of shape over a flu bug.

One morning, I was making small talk with an older woman and her husband before getting onto the elevator on the ninth floor of our hotel. I mentioned that I was from Washington state. She gasped, backed away, covered her face with her hands, and gestured that I should get on the elevator by myself. Her husband got into the elevator with me, and she stood outside looking at him. He finally convinced her to get in, but she crowded herself into a corner, said something along the lines of, “there just isn’t enough space in here”, and *waved* the air/germs/whatever out of the elevator when it stopped on the fourth floor before continuing on to the lobby.

This is absolutely nuts. I thought to myself. This woman is crazy.

And then I came home.

The sight of the crowds and empty shelves at Costco was terrifying. I couldn’t even order hand sanitizer from Amazon. We stocked up (not to hoarding status, but to get us through a couple extra weeks) on non-perishable food items. Thankfully, I’d bought toilet paper right before I left town. The Seattle area closed their schools. And then Oregon closed their schools. And then the entire state of Washington closed schools for SIX WEEKS.

What the hell was I going to do with my kids for six weeks at home??? I had to work. Maybe daycare or my mother-in-law could help out?

And then my husband’s work sent everyone home.

And then the governor put “social distancing” into effect and banned all large gatherings and “touch based” businesses. Which meant that I no longer had a “job”. My weddings were all being forced to postpone. I couldn’t do boudoir sessions because of proximity and my make-up artist couldn’t do her job. And births? I’m still waiting to find out how this will affect my next session in May…

And then things really started to hit me. This is serious. This has NEVER happened in my lifetime. We are living through history. People are dying. Hospitals are running out of supplies. “Essential” workers are (potentially) being exposed to a very dangerous virus all day long.

On a personal level, my anxiety started to build. What if my husband had to go back to work before “this” was all over? What if I didn’t have a business income for several months, how would I pay my overhead? What about my daughter’s birthday party? She’ll be so sad if we have to cancel! What about Easter? Do I need to go out and buy things for Easter baskets NOW? (spoiler alert… I did). Do we have enough baking supplies if we are exposed and need to fully quarantine ourselves and want to make bread and pancakes (‘cause my kids LOVE pancakes and I can’t imagine 14 days without pancakes).

…

With the “stay home, stay safe” announcement from Governor Inslee last night, and the Vancouver Parks and Rec department closing all parks until the end of next month, I had no other choice but to cancel/postpone all of my sessions for April, too. I don’t know how long things will go on like this, and I’m not sure when I’ll be able to “work” again, but I’m hoping, for all of our sakes, that things go back to “normal” soon.

Take care, everyone. Take care of yourselves and your families. Stay safe. Stay home. Catch up on Netflix and all those books that you’ve been meaning to read. We’ll get through this and I’ll see you on the other end!

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And Then I Came Home...